Tag Archives: conversations

Underpants

So I showed Hubster the waistband in the front of my underpants, and wouldn’t you know it was clearly meant to be in the rear.

Me: I was wondering why when I was sitting on the floor with the kids, my underpants were riding low in the back.
H: so you mean you’ve had them on backwards all day
Me: yep
H: and don’t you think you should correct that?
Me: we’ll that would require me to take off my shoes
H: do we need to get you Velcro shoes?

Autograph

Hailea: Em, how do spell it?
Hubster: I. T. Geez, maybe we should have dinner with Winnie the Pooh & he can teach you how to spell it.
Hailea: I know how to spell it. I. T.
Hubster: did you ever figure out who chip & dale are?
Hailea: yea the munkies.
Hubster: chipmunks
Hailea: yea the squirrels
Hubster: I think I’m going to have more fun than you guys. I’ll just let you drive the Lamborghini.
Hailea: YES! I’ll drive the Lamborghini!
Hubster: do you know who Pluto is?
Hailea: yes
Hubster: do you know who Mickey is?
Hailea: (laughing) yes
Me: do you know who Chris verde is?
Hubster: oh man he’s awesome. I think you ought to get his autograph now!
Hailea: well I do have blank pages in my book.
Me: (to myself) omg don’t encourage him

The butt angle

Hubster and I are in the kitchen with Brewster & snickers. Snickers was sniffing brewster’s bum. It was so funny (you had to be there for the visual), so I started laughing. I was sitting on the floor, so snickers comes over and starts licking my face.

Hubster: OMG. You now have Brewster bum on your face. She was sniffing his butt.
Me: she didn’t lick it, so it’s not on me.
H: she was sniffing it, and her lip touched it.
M: nuh-uh
H: yuh-huh. I saw it. Her bottom lips crossed the plane.
M: from your angle it may have looked like it, but you were up high. I was at the right butt angle to be able to see it, and she didn’t touch it.
H: can we record this conversation? Because you were at the right butt angle and that will be something to remember, and talk about later….

Mad cow

Hubster: snickers is licking the couch. Look at her long tongue.
(Snickers stops licking and glares at him)
Me: she’s telling you that you’re a tattletale and you need to shut up.
H: she’s got cow eyes.
M: big and brown…
H: and just enough white so it only shows when they’re going berserko.
M: with the mad cow disease….
(Snickers rolls/falls off the couch)

Poppie in the truck

Munchkin: mom?
Me: yea
Munchkin: poppie’s asleep in the truck
Me: that’s ok. Just as he’s not dead in the truck we’re ok
Mo: well if so we could just drive by a hospital, open the door, and push him out
Me: like in whatever movie that was. Well, if he was, that would be a little to griswaldy for me.
Hubster: or it would be like weekend at Bernie’s
*pulling up to stop light & poppie moves*
Munchkin: he’s not dead.

Broccoli

Munchkin: dad, can I get more broccoli please.
Hubster: sure
She goes into the kitchen, plays around a bit, and comes back out with some broccoli on her plate covered by a slice of cheese.
H: hey, I said you could have broccoli. I didn’t say you could have cheese.
M: but you can’t have broccoli without cheese.
H: broccoli makes you fart, but cheese on top of it is worse. It makes you fart on a fart on a fart.